A few weeks ago I asked for your help. I posted a blog asking for input on what it takes to be a great listener. Thank you to everyone who responded!  Your feedback was incredible.

amy_lynn222 Someone who is not always preparing a response in their head 🙂

amywells36 You know your a great listener when you create an environment of safety.

mikerknight A good listener puts away the day their having to take on the day the person talking is having.

amywells36 I am a Director of an Addiction program so I have not had to think about the how in awhile. Without writing a book I would say having the ability to project oneself into the personality of another person in order to better understand that persons emotions or feelings. This allows the speaker to know that you are interested in what they are saying and your not judging them. As a listener we display non verbal behaviors including body language. Long story short it opens the door for trust to build and creates elicit openness.

cpjsanborn Staying in the present moment, not judging, and knowing when to inject a loving word or two.

cpjsanborn Something else I thought of, a technique called “active listening.” Used in couples therapy. One person talks, then the other repeats back what they heard. Like the old “telephone” game we used to play in school. Often times what we hear isn’t what was actually said. It’s a practice that builds understanding and trust in a relationship, and it actually does make you a better listener. 👍. Tried it. It works. Relationship score, +1.

scribaniwannabe Someone who owns a time share.

kristineouw For me, being a great listener means engaging your heart. When we listen from that perspective, we can better hear the ‘heartbeat’ of what is being shared.

Liz Davis Dingus Being present in the conversation (not looking at phone/computer,etc.), making eye contact, empathizing, nodding to show you are following along, being aware of nonverbal cues, positioning your body in a manner that shows your interested in what the person has to say, not focusing on trying to solve a problem-just listening, listening to hear-not to respond, being patient

Matt Gould off the top of my head… 1) empathy. I’ve found to be a good listener I actually have to care more about the other person and what they have to say than about myself. 2) time. You have to let a conversation breathe to really get much substance out of it. Give a person time…even moments of quiet…in a conversation to allow thoughtful discourse. 3) Why? The most under utilized question. And you can’t ask it just for the sake of hoping a person answers to meet your preconceived opinion. Ask it with empathy in mind.

Elle Robillard Interaction and body language- nods, smiles, touching an arm or hand – have a conversation with Jenny – she is a great listener. I was imagining talking with her to answer your question!

(Note: the “Jenny” that Elle is referring to above is my amazing and beautiful wife…)

Thank you everyone for your feedback… if anyone has any more ideas, leave a comment below.

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